“Being self-made means never making an excuse as to why you can’t take steps toward whatever your goal is.” – Nipsey Hussle
For all intents and purposes, my son is my best friend. After seeing Spider-Man: Far From Home, today, I can recall a small thing that I, at least, take for granted. Like a big man in the paint, I perceive him as too little, he can’t just skip a step. His little legs must go step by step, and he often gets frustrated by my ability to go two steps at a time. I tell him, I rather be him, with the whole world ahead of him. Albeit he’s an ascending naif, he not trying to hear that.
“Jay favorite line, dog in due time.” – Kanye West.
Same thing with officiating. We often find officials that have severely less experienced as us, or vice versa, on the same game. We still have to officiate equally; our responsibilities tantamount.
Steps
Are literally
Right in front of
You when moving
Forward; it’s in your
Best interest to not skip
Them or run the risk of never
Being able to go up them again.
“Baby steps count, too, as long as you’re moving forward.” – Chris Gardner
TRANSGRESSION OF THE RULE:
The year is 2015, and I’m getting games hand over fist. I have 3 or 4 venues in heavy rotation for basketball, something that I feel like I’m getting pretty good at. I’m phasing out softball, a sport I’ve never had an inclination, an infinity to stand behind the plate. There was also flag football, but it was few and far between. Sure, there were games at times during the week, but always steady on Sundays. I found a lot of success early on in Flag Football because I listened to someone that showed me the way. I was here to recreate the same type of success, meteoric, by finding someone like that, in Basketball.
But that person, in the first few months never came. That’s when I met Alix. It was a Wednesday, and I was high off my old 2003 Nissan Altima was worked on to make it feel brand new, kicking stereo system and all, equipped with Bluetooth to satiate my ears. Alix saw my eagerness to learn, and I told him I’m ready for the next level, having mastered CYO, holding my own in an adult league, and obtaining my footing in the AAU circuit.
He was affable, quick to help me. I’ll never forget the note I wrote. He gave me the information of his Women’s association out in Queens. How fortunate was I to have 3 games with him that day; in fact a Women’s Adult league game, to see what I got in real-time.
“Takes forever to built a rep – one second to lose it.” – NaS
First two games went off without a hitch. They were easy enough. We were getting the game in, on time, as I was still learning the nuances of pacing myself to service multiple games in one day. Then the last game happened.
My inexperience showed. I tossed the ball so low, and had to do overdo over the jump ball twice. I can see Alix’s face. I duped him, a sham. I had less experience than I led on. He turned cold to me, and we barely spoke the rest of the night. It was another 3 years until I saw him again.
I went home, devastated, eviscerated. That game was too big for me in my short small career in officiating Basketball, and I was already rattled. I said I was ready for the North Shore of Hawaii, and I barely knew how to swim. I was playing myself, one toss at a time.
“Life is but a dream to me, gunshots sing to these
Other guys but lullabies don’t mean a thing to me
I’m not afraid of dying’, I’m afraid of not tryin’
Everyday hit every wave like I’m Hawaiin.” – Jay-Z
OBSERVANCE OF THE RULE:
It’s 2018, and I see Alix come into the facility. I hope he forgets me. I’ve seen him a few times, on other games at the same time, and I tried my best to act like I didn’t see him. Knowing him, like the way I am, and every other ref I know, he’s most likely observant. He done peeped me everyday damn time. I wonder if he thinks I got better? I wonder if he thinks I improved. I’m off that though. I just put my head down now, I learned my lesson. It’s not the result – nor the assignment, the best game. Every game is a blessing, whether it be major or minor. I just put my head down, and go in.
“When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached,
don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.” – Confucius
My tenacity the same, my aim a bit different. I learned something that initial instance with Alix; I didn’t want to play myself again. The marathon continues, as Nip would say – not a sprint. I was sprinting to rise fast, when I should have known that cream rises to the top. Only problem was, I was identifying myself as cream, instead of focusing on making myself creamy.
Those 3 years, since I last worked with him, that elapse of time, has paid dividends. Like over 1000 days ago, we were at the same place, where I tossed the ball incorrectly a few times, only thousands of tosses later. I went from worrying what he thinks, to improving incrementally from the last time I worked. My mind wasn’t acceptance from him. It was internal acceptance within myself to make sure that I never forget no one is better than me, being me.
“Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps, down new roads, armed with nothing but their own vision.” – Ayn Rand
And when we left, we spoke briefly on that fateful night 3 years prior. “You remember the last time we worked?” I inquired. He said with a long grin. “I do as a matter of fact!” He continued. “You ‘iight’ now, but before?!?” Say no more Alix. Say. No. More.
“Greatness comes by doing a few small and smart things each and every day. Comes from taking title steps, consistently. Comes from a making a few small chips against everything in your professional and personal life that is ordinary, so that a day eventually arrives when all that’s
left is THE EXTRAORDINARY.” – Robin S. Sharma
KEYS TO THE RULE:
Plan all the Way to the End: For one, in this game we call officiating, there is no time period in someone’s ascendence, their own individual greatness. No timestamp exists in anyone’s arrival. Someone might be in year 2 of their journey; another in year 15. Someone may be super tall, another may be so short. Nonetheless, we are all peers, and we should root for one another regardless. But when we discuss planning to the end, know that the end of a specific goal is only the beginning of a new goal. As the people at Crown Refs would attest, celebrate briefly, but move on to the next situation.
“The vision must be followed by the venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps – we must step up the stairs.” – Vance Havner
If you Get a Chance, Take it: Although opportunities vary and are abundant, that doesn’t mean they aren’t fleeting. Having said that, if you have an opportunity presents yourself, take it. That’s not necessarily skipping steps. Someone has been watching, deeming you ready for that opp. It’s up to you to be prepared for task. But you are; because:
You. Don’t. Skip. Steps.
“Aim for the sky, but move slowly, enjoying every step along the way. It is all those steps that make the journey complete.” – Chandra Kochar
Until Tomorrow.
